thoughts.

ohyesannyes (2:22:56 AM): i dont want to control anyone. if that person cant be faithful to me. its no point of being with that person. i dont want to have a relationship that i need to keep a guy on check. i want them to have their freedom. cause i would want my own. trust is the main key to a relationship

i finally realize that I DONT WANT A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP. i dont think i'm ready to call someone my boyfriend. sometimes i really want to commit but i dont think there is a guy that is worth me wanting to commit a serious relationship with. i just have to just wait for the day to come. but as of right now i just want to date just one guy and see where it goes. if it is worth to move on than why not. but if its not, than i'm sorry. i think i always wanted this but because of wilson coming along giving me this special feelings i never gotten from any guys made me felt that i do like him. the attractiong fooled me to think i like him. thinking about it, i dont know much about him to determine if i like him. i'm positive i'm really attracted to him. really attracted to. he could satisfy what i need and want. i believe he has the ability to do that. i really wonder whats the next step with me and wilson. i wonder if he would ever see more than just a friend with me. i wonder if he would ever like me. so many question i cant find the answer. maybe time could tell me. tell me what my heart really want forsure.

i want to leave city. i want to art school and be a famous interior design. i want to design a store/ house/ mall/ everything. =D i really want to one day see myself doing what i do best. i wish i could move back to hong kong n find a job there. maybe i will find my guy in hong kong in the end. =D

as of right now my heart hurts. iono why but it does. i guess i just got to learn not to care. never let little things to hurt myself. cause i want to be happy. i want to smile. i want to be free. i want to have fun again.

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